Former DJ on Radio Volta
Email the Reverend at revbookburn @

Friday, March 31, 2006

Open Letter to Father Pavone

Rev. Bookburn and others began circulating the following on Wednesday, March 29, via e-mail. It was in response to Pavone's recent 'Open Letter to Michael Schiavo.'

The Reverend consents to forwarding or circulating in any manner. May Pavone's cult learn about consent issues. Pavone will be dealt with on the radio show on April 2. Info:

Open Letter to Father Pavone- Director of Priests For Life:

Dear Misguided Pedophile Priest in a Dress,

I am Reverend Bookburn from Radio Volta. You are being communicated with because of your renewed exploitation of the Terry Schiavo story on the one-year anniversary of her passing.

You and I met in 2000 when we shouted at each other during the Republican Convention (you went outside the luncheon of GOP For Life when the media arrived like a tick to a blood host). Since The Reverend Is In began on internet radio, you have been one of the recipients of the Asshole of the Week award. However, the Rehab for Pedophile Priests shows (at least three episodes so far) have been among the most popular with the Bookburners.

Your exploitation of the Schiavo case for personal, political and financial gain is indefensible. When I met you, I thought you weren't as appalling as the violent terrorists who have attacked abortion clinics and perpetrated bombings and shootings for over 25 years in the name of 'life.' You gave me the impression that you were a dorky pedophile who could change for the better if removed from the cult and provided with intense psychiatric treatment. However, there's something about your Schiavo crusade that seems to make you extra special... like someone who no longer warrants kid gloves. Consequently, it's time to strip away your dress from fantasyland and shove some hard reality down your throat.

First, the basics. The Schiavo family does not need to be turned into a political football for opportunists and a plethora of wing-nuts. Yes, some of them are whacked and hooked up with their theocratic exploiters. However, their situation one year ago was relevant to the family and the medical community, and irrelevant to the Church of Pedophilia. You have no legitimate business publicly commenting about Michael Schiavo at all, let alone publicly bashing him once again.

So, even though it's obvious, let's review a very fair equation. Your cult stays out of the medical community and doctors will not tell you which altar boy pictures to hang in your holy bathroom. As internet radio clergy, it is my duty to inform you that anyone who stands for mandatory suffering is an asshole. I've worked with suffering and dying people for years and there is no plausible argument against that statement. Prolonging life-support against the consent of the person is the action of an asshole. Denying emergency contraception to rape victims (a shameful policy of Catholic hospitals) is the action of assholes. Denying medical marijuana to people with catastrophic illness is the policy, decision, stance and action of assholes.

Now that we're clear, it is time for you to remove yourself from situations that do not concern you. I know you need fund-raisers and issues to get your naive blind sheep excited, but hysteria at the expense of the suffering is unacceptable. Don't even think about attempting this kind of bullshit with me if I end up in a state of being similar to Terry Schiavo. My friends, co-workers, ex's, and the Bookburners know that my first wish is for all exploiters and cult leaders to be driven away. If you stand outside my window during such a time, you will be surrounded by g-string clad men and women (adult-aged, sorry) who will be dancing with various contraception items and pleasure toys. Then you will be in close proximity of a very hot game of Twister (that's still great). That will be followed by a serious exhibition of kissing and touching featuring every possible orientation and persuasion (but strictly fully grown humans, sorry). These and related activities shall continue until the flocks of Taliban-clones remove themselves permanently from the premises.

While we're on the subject of the self-appointed definers of 'morality' and the 'moral' high ground, how do you get the nerve to even open your mouth? Isn't your predecessors' history of conquest, genocide, slavery, destruction of multiple cultures, and theocratic empires enough for you? The support your church afforded to the Third Reich alone should be enough to keep your cult to stick to your own scenes and out of public policy. Additionally, in a nation that at least has the pretense of being a democracy for a diverse population, you have no legitimate business attempting to be dictators for all. Beginning today, it's time for you to begin reading Hitler's Pope, Lead Us Not Into Temptation- Catholic Priests and the Sexual Abuse of Children, Broken Covenant, and Betrayal of Trust- Clergy Abuse of Children.

Being a significant player in the Church of Pedophilia is another reason why you are laughable as a 'moral' crusader. The twenty-plus years of cover-ups of literally thousands of priest perpetrators makes you a part of the largest child sexual abuse scandal in human history. Before you dismiss my show as nothing but shock radio humor, why don't you assess your church's efforts to rehabilitate the perps with it's own programs? You can start with the disastrous program in New Mexico.

My Rehab for Pedophile Priest shows provides a way to introduce you freakazoids to adult sexuality and adult erotica. It's obvious what your celibacy policies, repression, and 'abstinence' programs have caused. Yes, strong humor is a key component of my efforts. But in a world dominated by theocrats and other sociopaths, we survive a bit better with shocking and even absurd humor. However, there can be a fine line between shock humor and vision. That's why my show eventually intends to begin marketing inflatable altar boys. We may even choose to make the Rehab for Pedophile Priest shows a part of a special video project.

In addition to rehabilitating your horrifying peers, I'd also like to call attention to some of your more obvious issues. Like most of your contemporaries, you hear voices, hallucinate angels, receive divine commands, and have visions of Our Lady of Guacamole. Since you have such extreme psychiatric issues, may I recommend redirecting your energy away from harassing Michael Schiavo and pregnant women, and immediately seeking appropriate treatment, probably including medication.

Meantime, please discontinue your diligent efforts to make the world an even worse place. When you fight to ban late-term abortion, you are working towards establishing policies that result in the deaths of countless women. When you speak about birth control, 'abstinence,' erotica, and related subjects, you are offering the perspective of one who is absolutely clueless (you and your colleagues are incapable of offering any worthwhile thoughts on these subjects). Since you feel such a strong need to be highly public and on a soapbox, you can start by seeking to clean up your own backyard. Support my efforts to rehabilitate your thousands of sickoids.

Free clue: you're only going to amuse us when you attempt to infuse science into your rhetoric. Your twisted cult is as compatible with science as Santa Claus is to international relations.

Leave the Schiavos alone and stay out of government and public policy or start paying taxes like people who are not too dysfunctional to be productive for a living. Take down your Home Alone I poster and get rid of your Olson Twins videos (from their early days). Find yourself a good treatment provider until you no longer feel compelled to harass, control, abuse or destroy.

If you need help, the Reverend will provide.

Rev. Bookburn
Radio Volta


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